Thank you for sharing

I will listen if you want to talk/tell me what happened.

I am hearing…

How are you feeling right now, if you can describe it?

I welcome/understand your emotion (anger/rage/sadness)

I imagine that was…… but please correct me if I’m wrong

Do you prefer to talk on the phone, or do you want to meet in person? Would like to take a walk? OR I don’t have the capacity for this conversation/my boundary is __.

Are you taking care of yourself? What would you like to do? Can I help with X?

Survivor / person who was harmed

That sucks.

You have to tell me/X-person what happened.

What I would do is…

Don’t presume they feel a certain way, eg, “oh, you must feel X” or “victims feel/do X”

OMG, you sound crazy/not like yourself. You “need help”. What you’re feeling isn’t okay and/or isn’t normal.

—

Can’t you tell someone else this? Also, please don’t simply not respond to a survivor

You have to speak up / fix the perpetrator / don’t ruin the perpetrator’s life / file a police report / press charges!

“Victim” - many people have a strong aversion to being called a “victim”. In a professional/legal context, you may call someone an accuser, but perhaps avoid the term when supporting someone you are friends with/related to/in community with.